Denise Welch on domestic abuse and the early warning signs

Denise Welch and Charlene White chatted on the latest Loose Women podcast…

Following Loose Women’s recent Royal Television Society Award win for the launch of the show’s groundbreaking Facing It Together domestic abuse awareness campaign, Denise opens up on the response to last month’s special episode and to her sharing her own experience of domestic abuse:

“I have never had in my memory, had such an incredible response to the piece of me talking, for quite an amount of time, very personally about the sort of things that had happened to me. It was a wonderful response and great to see that the campaign is working so well. But it was also a heartbreaking response because hearing from victims, survivors of abuse, not just physical of course, like mine coercive control. Also hearing from women and men who, until they saw me talk, didn’t really have a name for it or they just related to it and said, ‘Oh my God, that’s me’ and it was very, very upsetting, but heartwarming in a way, to know that we’re doing something to help.” 

She later explains:

“I’d gone home, I then had a reason to drive up to the north and I was in the car and I was reflecting on the show that we’d done, and on the response that I’d had, and I just started to think back to all of those years, because it’s a long time ago now, and to think of what I went through with this person.

“I mean, it was seven years. I just got so upset, of feeling so sorry for that girl or that woman that I was, that I turned off into a services and I sobbed for about ten minutes. I can’t remember the last time I’ve ever done that, I just really needed to get a lot out of my system and then I was okay and I got on my way.” 

During the podcast episode, Denise talks more about her experience of coercive control and what she went through, sharing:

“I was so frightened of a kick off or him saying anything again. It wasn’t unusual to feel like that. We went to the restaurant and I smoked at the time, and I remember going in my bag and putting a packet of cigarettes on the table. I went to the toilet and I came back. They weren’t there. And I said, ‘Oh, where’s my cigarettes?’ He went, ‘What cigarettes?’ I said, ‘The cigarettes on the table’. And he looked at my family and he went, ‘Did you see cigarettes there?’ They didn’t say anything. Afterwards my sister said, ‘I didn’t like to say he took your cigarettes, hid them, and then told you that the cigarettes weren’t there’ and we use the phrase now, gaslighting.” 

Throughout the conversation, Denise and Charlene also highlight some of the signs of domestic abuse to look out for and where viewers or listeners can go for further advice and help: www.itv.com/helplines

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