Showbiz 10: ‘What man is going to be attracted to a noonie that looks like a baby’s?’

This Showbiz 10 is classy purified, from hairy fanny to Katie Price’s padlock, and it’s not where you think it should be.

A world of fantasy

No, we’re not talking about Donald Trump’s current situation – its all about comedians James Acaster, Lou Sanders, Phil Wang and Sally Phillips.

The four are to team up and take part in a live game of Dungeons & Dragons on Friday 4 December to raise money for Comic Relief.

Hosted by Comic Relief and Wizards of the Coast, the creators of the storytelling game, ‘Comic Relief plays Dungeons & Dragons: Episode 2’ will bring together the comedians and invite the public to get involved by helping to shape the story by casting votes on crucial elements of the fantasy battle.

Dungeons & Dragons is a role-playing game and pop culture staple that allows participants to become fantasy heroes such as wizards and rogues and delve into an imaginary world where anything is possible. Dungeon Master Paul Foxcroft will guide players and viewers through the action, setting goals to accomplish and offering rewards along the way.

For a minimum donation of a pound, the public will also be able to have a say in the comedian’s gaming decisions.

The first Comic Relief plays Dungeons & Dragons live game took place earlier this year in May with comedians Sue Perkins, Nish Kumar, Sara Pascoe and Ed Gamble. The event raised over £25,000 for Comic Relief.

Donations can be made whilst watching the game, which will be live streamed on Friday 4 December from 7.30pm onwards at www.comicrelief.com/dnd


A little time

Jesy Nelson is to have extended time away from Little Mix it was this week announced by the girl group’s management on social media.

On Tuesday (November 17), the band’s publicist revealed that Jesy needed to spend time off from performing to deal with a medical issue.

“Jesy is having extended time off from Little Mix for private medical reasons. We will not be issuing any further comment currently and ask media to please respect her privacy at this time,” – Little Mix social media statement


A hairy situation

Stacey Solomon has been left baffled by criticism of her body hair. Speaking to a tabloid’s magazine she noted that her boyfriend Joe Swash is a fan of her big hairy noonie.

‘What man is going to be attracted to a noonie that looks like a baby’s? In the ’70s it was all about the bush, wasn’t it? What changed? ‘Luckily, Joe loves the bush, so that’s OK!’ – Stacey speaking to the Sun

Medical advice also suggests that ‘body hair is there for a reason’ so a bald pussy should only be found in the feline world.


Younger than springtime

Sticking with the Loose Women and another regular on the panel, along with Stacey Solomon, is Corrie and Hollyoaks actress Denise Welch.

This week fans of the performer took to social media to praise Denise after she shared photos of herself eight years apart – the first while she was addicted to booze and the second nearly a decade after her last drop.

“This week is Alcohol Awareness Week. I had my last drink in April 2012. Next year I’ll have been sober for 9 yrs.

“Apart from my children it is the thing I am most proud of. Not only for myself but for the people who love me. This photo was taken leaving the same event last year and when I was drinking. But worse than what it was doing to me physically was what it was doing to me mentally. Anxiety, paranoia, anger, fear, depression, shame, you name it.

“Sobriety has given me my life back and allowed me to deal with life’s constant challenges in a clear headed, balanced way.” – Denise speaking on Instagram


The perfect end to 2020

Jacqueline Jossa has spoken about her perfect end to a terrible year for everyone.

On making her West End debut in A Christmas Carol, she spoke to ITV’s Lorraine Kelly this week noting,

“It’s almost a little bit of a pinch me moment. I am terrified but it’s going to be fine… it’s a perfect way to finish the year I think… For me this is probably a perfect debut, less people, less nerves, hopefully I will be better.”


Apart Together

Following the special one-off concert livestream from Sydney’s iconic Trackdown Studios, Tim Minchin released his debut studio album Apart Together, this week via BMG. The new record is a rich suite of disarmingly honest story-songs written with Minchin’s inimitable wistfulness and whimsy.

Although best known for his politically charged punchlines and hit musicals, past indie favourites like Not Perfect and White Wine in the Sun, as well as the recent Missy Higgins release of his heart-breaking ballad, Carry You, have hinted at Minchin’s breadth as a singer-songwriter. Apart Together is masterfully produced and co-orchestrated by Daniel Denholm, giving it a rare cohesiveness that lends itself to the lost art of listening to an album in a single sitting.

Apart Together is available for purchase and stream on all platforms [HERE]. The official artist store features exclusive merchandise bundles and signed formats including limited dual coloured vinyl.


A Quek news announcement

Sam Quek announced on social media that she is expecting a child with partner Tom Mairs.

Digital Spy noted ‘The former I’m a Celebrity contestant and hockey player explained alongside the announcement that it comes 10 months after they suffered a heartbreaking miscarriage.’

“I am delighted to (finally) announce that I am 6 months pregnant. After a devastating miscarriage earlier this year, I kept the news very private. However I’m now in a place where I can talk about what happened in the hope my experience can help others.” – Sam Quek on Twitter


Castle sees more Celebs

Actress Ruthie Henshall and singer Russell Watson were the latest contestants to join ITV’s I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! with the pair arriving on the show on Tuesday (17 November).

Ruthie – famous for playing the lead roles in hit West End musicals including Chicago, dated Prince Edward on and off for five years when she was younger and remains good friends with him, even attending his wedding to Sophie, Countess of Wessex.

While Russell – like many musicians across the country – has had to put all his touring plans on hold and so the chance to take part on this year’s I’m A Celebrity came at the perfect time.

And whilst he is in camp, the singer said before entering, he hopes to dispel a big misconception that tenors are snooty.

You can judge for yourselves every weeknight on ITV at 9pm


Faggots are off the menu

BBC Radio 1 will not play the original version of Fairytale of New York by The Pogues and Kirsty MacColl this Christmas, because its audience may be offended by some of the lyrics, the Beeb this week announced, while they added that Radio 2 would play the version in which a couple throw insults at each other.

“We know the song is considered a Christmas classic and we will continue to play it this year, with our radio stations choosing the version of the song most relevant for their audience.” – BBC


Price locked

It just isn’t a Showbiz 10 newswrap without the darling of the tabloids Katie Price making appearance. Sometimes its funny, sometimes its serious, sometime even heartbreaking, but she always shares her life warts and all. Although in her list of medical issues she doesn’t appear to have those yet.

This week she shared her serious concerns over son Harvey’s weight problems. The Metro quoted her as stating she has been forced to padlock the fridge as she fears 28 stone Harvey may eat himself into an early grave.

“Every time I feed him, it’s killing him” the paper quoted, adding, “The doctors have told me he’s at high risk of having a heart attack. He’s 27 and a half stone, wears 5XL clothes and he gets out of breath walking up the stairs. So of course I panicked. ‘I can’t see him living past 50 unless we sort out his weight and breathing.”

Harvey who is partially blind, has autism and Prader-Willi syndrome sees the latter condition cause excessive appetite.

In less serious Price news she went on a social media rant this week saying she doesn’t care about ex-Peter Andre anymore. So that’s that sorted.


The views in this opinion item are those of Vivian Summers and are not endorsed by ATV News or ATV Today.
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One thought on “Showbiz 10: ‘What man is going to be attracted to a noonie that looks like a baby’s?’

  1. I bet Joe gets the hairs from her noonie right beetween the gaps in his teeth, be like a nitcomb by the end of it.

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